“DAY IN AND DAY OUT”

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Twinklebear and I have amazing consistency.

Take away the fact that you know Twinklebear and I are “Twin Flames,” with all that implies in terms of eternal togetherness. Remove from your mind, our talk of the intensity and depth of our love for each other. Put aside what you know didactically about what Twin Flame relationships are supposed to be. If we take a bare bones look at what our relationship has been and is, here is the essence that you are left with:

Amazing and unrelenting consistency.

Doesn’t sound as fancy or romantic as the rest of it, does it? Yet, this stripped down perception of what Twinklebear and I have, may have greater meaning than all of the flowery Twin Flame prose with regard to what we are. It also enlightens as to the longevity of what we are. “Practical reality” may inform and signal “spiritual truth.”

Such a bare bones look demands that one pay tremendous respect for our very base, our rock-like foundation, which ultimately does justify the Twin Flame imagery that we’ve just discarded for our “bare bones look.” And that is the point. So, what is the point? And what is it that we are unfailingly consistent about? It is remarkably simple and straightforward.

Day in and day out, we remain the same with respect to needing to be with each other.

And when we cannot be together due to schedules and daily life obligations, we need to be intimately aware of where the other is. We make it our business to be totally open and complete with respect to informing the other, as if this keeps us close spiritually, no matter what the other is doing. We need to do what our other half is doing. In our case, the term “other half” is meant as literally as is possible.

And we have been so, ever since we “reunited” as Twin Flames three and half years ago. What this clearly shows is that what we are and we have, is no fad, not infatuation, and is something soul-deep—and this shows by its unambiguous depth, breadth and persistence. We need each other every day, day in and day out without respite. It reeks of the endlessness, a deep well of need and love that has no bottom. All this from 3,000 miles away from each other. And it is this last point that makes it so remarkable, and “superreal.”

Delete from the equation, our seamless compatibility. Ignore our innately totally open sexuality and sensuality that we have. Pay no attention to our profound knowledge of each other as reincarnated husband and wife from past lives. Pay no heed to the list of proven ways that Twinklebear and I know that we are Twin Flames. Take all of this way from view, and what do we have?

We have left, a burning and unending desire to be with each other always, that makes the absence of the other for short periods of time due to conflicting schedules, painful. But in the end, this one consistency we have, does signal that we are Twin Flames. I’m afraid there is no getting around that, no matter how much stripping away of the layers of Twin Flame meaning we unfold, from the essence. And this “essence” is that we must have each other day in and day out. Period.

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I love you, Twinklbear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pact Forever!
12 12 12 in every way

“ROYAL ASCOT LADY”

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Twinklebear: Royal Ascot Lady.

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ANONYMOUS POET 1823

“Ladies’ Day…when the women, like angels, look sweetly divine.”

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This is Royal Ascot Week in England, when Ascot in Berkshire hosts a week of thoroughbred horse races. Today is the third day of Royal Ascot Week and ever since that anonymous poet made his 1823 poetic pronouncement, the third day of the week has been known as “Ladies’ Day.”

Ascot Racecourse was founded by Queen Anne in 1711. Although Ascot held races from that time, it wasn’t until 1911 that it was expanded into what is now known as Royal Ascot Week. Traditionally, Royal Ascot Week takes place during the third week of every June—and has become the centerpiece of Ascot’s year. Over the years Royal Ascot Week has been associated with the trappings of the Royals, when the Queen and her family attend every year.

In the popular culture if it is at all possible, Royal Ascot Ladies’ Day has become the shining exemplar of the Royal Ascot, overshadowing the rest of Royal Ascot in the minds of the public. Every year, lovely ladies from around the world attend Royal Ascot to show their sartorial splendor.

This year my Twin Flame love Twinklebear, decided to go to Ladies’ Day to witness all the pomp and circumstance that surrounds this populist day during Royal Ascot Week. With all of the glitz and glamour that Ladies’ Day is famous for, I’m not even sure if Twinklebear will watch any races. I believe this may be the first horse race event she will have attended, but am uncertain how she will perceive the horse racing, as she is such a conscientious animal lover, and protector of animals’ welfare. She also has no interest in gambling, which really underpins horse racing.

She is now making the trip to Ascot with some of her lady friends. I am always awed by how lovely Twinklebear is, and perhaps it is based of me to state that I absolutely believe that she will be the most beautiful woman at the event, bar none. I often call her my “Viking Princess” as her appearance would suggest Scandinavian blood in her familial background.

It is well known that the Vikings began invading England in the 8th century. In today’s popular culture, the true adventures of Ragnar Lodbrok from that time, are memorialized in the “The Vikings” television series. By the late 9th century, the Vikings had overrun most of England.

No doubt, many of today’s blonde British beauties like my Twinklebear, can credit their stunning beauty to the intermingling of the Vikings with Anglo-Saxons of the early centuries. This reminds me of some interesting remarks I recently read, from an article in The Spectator magazine titled, “I thought I was British. Until I Took A DNA Test” by Anthony Whitehead…..

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“A declaration of nationality is a profound statement. To say ‘I am British’ suggests that somehow I am composed of Britishness — that my fabric, my very being, is British. Except I personally, apparently, am not particularly British. The results are back from my DNA ethnicity test….How do I feel about my nationality now?

I am fair-haired….so a Viking forebear is an exciting thought. I am already feeling….more international than I did. The things we associate with passport nationality, my cultural loyalties and sense of identity have shifted. In particular, DNA provides a new way of telling you who you are. In…England we seem confused about this. As we find ourselves in the midst of one of history’s great migrations, it seems likely that angst about identity is only going to increase — and if the EU referendum proved anything, it is that people in Britain feel very differently indeed about who they are….

My DNA was compared with that of others on Ancestry’s database and as a result I have now been put in touch with some 150 people throughout the world who have sections of DNA which match my own. Some use the site to post online profiles, and some include thumbnail photos of themselves. My jaw dropped when I clicked on Mark from Pennsylvania. He looks like me. Pattie from California could be my younger sister.”

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Aside from being coined “Ladies’ Day” by that anonymous poet in 1823, today’s Ladies’ Day harkens back to a time when Royal Ascot Week was a male-dominated event, when women were given discounts for admission, or allowed in for free. The gendered pay-scale disappeared with time, but Ladies’ Day became more entrenched as a viable institution on the third day of Ascot Week. Ultimately, more women attended dressed to the nines as a tradition—and Ladies’ Day became in effect, a glamour day out for ladies. Amazingly, Ascot does not officially recognize Ladies’ Day.

Ladies’ Day is a truly populist event.

It will be quite a day at Ascot today, and quite a Ladies’ Day! Imagine masses of splendidly attired women converging on this hamlet, wearing outfits from mild to wild, and you have an idea of what Ladies’ Day is like. Then imagine if you will, my Twinklebear in her splendiferous oufit—arriving like a royal princess herself.

My Viking Princess.

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I love you, Twinklbear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pact Forever
12 12 12 in every way

“BLUE TURQUOISE”

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Twinklebear’s blue turquoise eyes.

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SHAKESPEARE SAYING INSPIRED BY MATTHEW 6:22-23
“Eyes are the window to the soul.”

FROM A SPIRITUAL WEBSITE
“Typically when we make eye contact with someone, we turn away after a few seconds. With your twin flame, you can keep eye contact for what feels like “forever” without feeling any awkwardness. They say eyes are the gateway to the soul, and because your twin flame’s soul is reflecting part of you back at you, you can easily look into their eyes for long periods of time. You may find it difficult to keep your eyes off of each other beyond just physical attraction/lust.”

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“Twinklebear” is my Twin Flame love, and wife from past lifetimes, in which we lived and loved together. When I look into her blue turquoise eyes, I feel the love, lust and loyalty that comes from my genetically hardwired alpha masculinity, built upon thousands of years. On the surface level, she moves me to want her, and I do in every sense of the word. Just thinking about her, as I am doing now, moves me to want her, to lust after her, to love her deeply, with a turgidity spontaneously achieved. A turgidity palpable and sensitive to thought input. All this, I feel when I look into, or even think about her blue turquoise eyes.

The eyes are the windows to the soul.

And there you have it. You have the answer to this hypersensitivity I have toward my beloved Twinklebear. When I look into her blue turquoise eyes, or merely think of them and her, I am drawn in. Drawn into her very soul, which is the same soul DNA as mine, as we are of and from the same soul material. When I look into her blue turquoise eyes, or even think of them, I want to be in her, on her and with her. Such is the power of the soul connection with one’s soul Twin. The lust is palpable, and never ending. The love is forever, enduring the absence of each other for perhaps centuries at a time, until we found each other again in 2015.

When we are away from each other, “I miss you” is inadequate. When we are away from each other, particularly if I don’t know precisely where she is, I suffer the same angst of the Mongol warrior I was over thousand years ago, when she was taken from me. Liam Neeson has nothing on me! When I look into her blue turquoise eyes, or even think of them, I harken back to a time when I said….

“I don’t know who you are, but I will find you and I will kill you. And I will bring my Twinklebear home.”

It is no mere coincidence that for decades before Twinklebear and I found each other again, that I trained in the arts of violence and killing. I not only trained in these arts, I taught them with a voraciousness that bespoke of a need to maim and kill. My martial arts students were taught to have a killer instinct, one that I honed in myself, that left no room for mercy. I was formed and therefore destined, to be a warrior, genetically hardwired from a thousand years ago when I needed all the killer instinct I had, to find and save Twinklebear (read “He Was Asian And Wore All Black”).

When I look into her blue turquoise eyes, I am reacting not merely to the normal beauty of them, I am sensing and truly seeing the “Soul That Is Twinklebear,” that she is and was since time immemorial. I am seeing and sensing a time when her eyes were brown and dark, but no less beautiful or enticing. Beyond that, I am seeing past her given name of this lifetime. That given name, is but a way-stop in the space and time continuum of our Twin Flame Journey. I can’t remember a time when I last called her by her given name. Her given name is a foreign, semi-real name. Her true name is “Twinklebear”—for all time.

Just as my true name is Sookybear, and not “Scott.” I can only recall one instance when Twinklebear called me “Scott” and when she did, I felt inwardly offended, as if I was being called by a false name. I believe that our “nicknames” of Twinklebear and Sookybear, are our true names, the only names that matter. I know this, and feel this. I also know and feel, that Twinklebear knows and feels that her given name is a temporary name.

It is a mysterious thing, although she and I can understand it. When I look into her blue turquoise eyes, I am seeing past them into the soul of The One I loved a thousand years ago, and beyond to the beginning of time. When I listen to Twinklebear talking, I hear the words that bore a different sound, and spoke a different language than English. When she and I gaze intently into each other’s eyes, we wish we could look without the interruption of “life as it is” now, for the pleasure and attraction is endless, and satisfying emotionally.

Eyes are the window to the soul.

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I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pact Forever!
12 12 12 in every way

“THE SNAKES OF KARMIC EVIL”

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TWINKLEBEAR: So astute!

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TWINKLEBEAR’S COMMENTARY ABOUT MY “PROTECTOR” MEMOIR

I love this memoir my Sookybear, I love you. Thank you so much, for always being my PROTECTOR and GUARDIAN. I am so lucky to have you. I wonder if it is some sort of constant Karmic force, where the people remain the same, only the time and places change? Maybe each time the “Kidnapper” is the same person, each time forcing his EVIL ways, through time, space, and so on? Only the circumstances and venues are more seemingly comfortable, and unsuspecting. I love my Sookybear! Thank you! Podmates, Twinflames, Bear Pact Forever and a day! 121212.

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What an astute observation on Twinklebear’s part! “Twinklebear” is my Twin Flame love. My last memoir, “Protector” as you know, featured my role as Twinklebear’s guardian and protector in past lives and this life. When I read her insightful comment, my mind flashed to two significant threats to her health and life in the past—and to be clear, when I say “past” in this context I mean the past in this life, not in past lives.

Really, when I thought about it, these threats struck me as “Medusan” in nature. They represented two deadly snakes growing from a malignant Gorgonic Medusan Head of evil, that might have preexisted in our past lives together. As you know from reading “Protector,” I saved her from from an abductor in late 11th to early 12th century Mongolia. This human evil snake I rescued her from was an outgrowth of the Medusan Head of evil that might be chronic threat to Twinklbear’s well-being. As Twinklebear said, “…the people remain the same, only the time and places change…”

In this lifetime, there was a very clear threat to Twinklbear’s health and indeed life, which I helped save her from—which you can read about Here. This deadly snake of a malignancy growing from the Medusan Head of evil however, was only one of the two threats to Twinklebear from her past. The other one had a human head.

In retrospect with the help of Twinklbear’s observation, I recognize this other threat to her well-being from her past as a human snakehead. As I have said in past memoirs, I will not get into specifics to protect our privacy. But I can tell you that this person was and is a malignancy as dark and malevolent as that cancer that we beat. They are from one and the same dark evil force.

In 11th century Asia, fierce Mongol warriors rode horses and slung deadly arrows from their mounts. They also committed wholesale slaughter and indulged in the wanton abduction of women. Things have change since then, but as Twinklebear said, “…each time the kidnapper is the same person…forcing his evil ways….only the venues are more seemingly comfortable, and unsuspecting…” In the 21st century, abductors masquerade as friendly beings, only to slowly unmask as time rolls on, after their deceit has worked.

In the present, the abduction of women may take on subtler overtones. The weapon of choice is not the bow and arrow, but rather the velvet hammer of insidious deception. The men who inflict hurt and harm on women in this century, leave persistent wounds on their emotional abductees. The kidnapping process may have been quick in the 11th century and prolonged in the 21st century, but the deleterious effects on women is what they have in common.

In this era of electric lights, gaslight still remains hugely useful to the evil practitioners of the dark arts of women abuse. Other dark tools of this devious trade would make psychological warfare experts jealous. Intimidation, projection and constant repression form the modern day bondage of women, as effective as the ropes and cages of the 11th century.

FROM NBCNEWS.COM

Psychologists use the term “gaslighting” to refer to a specific type of manipulation where the manipulator is trying to get someone else to question their own reality, memory or perceptions. And it’s always a serious problem, according to psychologists. It may start out with seemingly small offenses. But the problem is that even more-or-less insignificant instances of you questioning your own judgment or reality — thanks to the deliberate intent of someone else — can snowball. You can end up in a cycle of not being able to negotiate your daily life in a way where you are clear minded, can focus, can make sound decisions, and have a sense of well-being.

There usually tends to be a power dynamic when gaslighting happens. The manipulator holds enough power that the target of the gaslighting is terrified to change the relationship or step out of the gaslighting dynamic because the threat of losing that relationship — or the threat of being seen as less than who you want to be seen as to them — is quite a threat. If it’s happening by someone you love and care about, you’re going to WANT to believe the other person — and the gaslighter may use that against you. Be wary of gaslighting if you start to question yourself a lot. Watch out for these:

Withholding (meaning he or she refuses to listen or says they don’t understand).
Countering (when the abuser questions the gaslightee’s memory of an event). Blocking/diverting (when the abuser changes the subject or questions the victim’s thinking). Trivializing (making the victim’s needs or feelings seem unimportant). Forgetting/denial (when the manipulator pretends to have forgotten what actually happened or denies something he or she had previously agreed to).

And note that a gaslighter will oftentimes start with something that is true that you might be particularly sensitive about to hook you. You’re constantly second guessing yourself or have trouble making decisions. You’re ruminating about a perceived character flaw (like being too sensitive or not a good enough person) In a confrontation with the person that might be gaslighting you, you feel like you suddenly find yourself in an argument you didn’t intend to have, you’re not making progress or you’re saying the same thing over and over again and not being heard. You’re frequently making excuses for your partner’s behavior.

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I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pact Forever
12 12 12 in every way

“PROTECTOR”

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During my martial arts teaching days.

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FROM A PSYCHOLOGY WEBSITE

A protector’s primary interest is in the safety and security of the person or persons they care about. Protectors have an extraordinary sense of loyalty and responsibility in their makeup, and seem fulfilled in the degree they can shield others from the dirt and dangers of the world. Speculating and experimenting do not intrigue Protectors, who prefer to make do with time-honored and time-tested procedures rather than change to new.

At work Protectors are seldom happy in situations where the rules are constantly changing, or where long-established ways of doing things are not respected. Protectors value tradition. They are not as outgoing and talkative as others, and their shyness is often misjudged as stiffness, even coldness, when in truth Protectors are warm-hearted and sympathetic, giving happily of themselves.

Their reserve ought really to be seen as an expression of their sincerity and seriousness of purpose. Protectors are willing to work long, hard hours quietly doing all the thankless jobs that others manage to avoid. Protectors are quite happy working alone. In positions of authority they may try to do everything themselves rather than direct others to get the job done. Thoroughness and frugality are also virtues for them. When Protectors undertake a task, they will complete it if humanly possible.

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If you read through these memoirs, you will read about one specific recurrent dream that Twinklebear has had since her teenage years, about a man she has recognized as me, rescuing her from a kidnapper in an early century in Asia. The specifics of this recurrent dream, have been amazingly consistent over the years. Interestingly, one detail that Twinklebear has had in these dreams that she paid little attention to, was of an older woman who also helped to shield her from harm.

The most fascinating aspect of this detail in Twinklebear’s recurrent dream, is an epiphany Twinklbear had just last year, about this woman. Twinklebear realized that this woman was my mother. You can read about this realization in Memoir: Candy Connection. Like many significant latent memories in the Twin Flame world, Twinklebear’s memory of this was triggered by a photograph of my home in Queens, New York. When Twinklebear saw the photo, she recognized my house as the one in her dream, “Where an older Chinese woman pulled me inside,” as Twinklebear states it. In her recurrent dream, my mother pulled Twinklebear inside this house to hide her from the abductors who were chasing her.

Of great significance, this recurrent dream that Twinklebear has had since her teen years, abruptly stopped when she met me in 2015, as if she had been waiting for my arrival in her life—and when I did, it was a signal that I was her rescuer in her dreams—and her guardian and protector now. I can flatly say now, that I have been sent here to protect my Twinklebear. Sent by whom? It is a very mysterious question that speaks to the spiritual realm. But after all, what is the Twin Flame phenomenon but a spiritual matter?

Twin flames are two separate souls that was a single soul cleaved in half at the beginning of time by a Higher Power. This created two separate people, two souls known as “Twin Flames.” Who else could that Higher Entity be but God? I accept that. The purported purpose of this cleaving of one soul was to create two separate souls, who would be the perfect mate to the other.

If we can accept the validity of these premises, then certainly we can accept that a Twin Flame could be sent to Earth—purposed as it were—to serve a specific role in the life and lives of his or her Twin Flame. In my and Twinklebear’s case, that would be plural, because I have served as her protector in past lives as well as in this life. It is clear from the recurrent dreams, latent memories and retrocognitive visions and dreams, that I have been “sent here” to protect my Twinklebear. Lets not forget about the “coincidences” in our Twin Flame journey, that remind of this adage:

There are no coincidences in the Twin Flame world.

Here’s one of our “coincidences.” It has been well established that a great many men in Asia, are directly descended from Temujin (Genghis Khan). However, how many of those millions of men of Asian descent, have the nickname of “Genghis” as I have had since my early 20s (“Genghis” was a life long biker nickname bestowed upon me by another biker way back when, and “Sookybear” is a nickname Twinklebear gave me three years ago)? Not many. What does my nickname have to do with coincindences? Just this—Twinklebear has had a deep life long interest in Genghis Khan.

Twinklebear has had an inexplicable fascination with Genghis Khan from an early age, incongruous with her tender age when it took hold. Described in many of the earlier memoirs, is the humorous childhood scene of Twinklebear demanding books about Genghis Khan from her mum in book stores. I can picture her stamping her little bratty feet at the age of eight. Ha! So cute! I find it hilarious that she did this, when other eight year old girls wanted coloring books and a box of crayons. All of these “coincidences” in our Twin Flame journey, I see as “evidence.” Yes, evidence confirmatory of true Twin Flames and my role as her protector. She said to me this morning, “You are so kind and protective.” That comment alone, set the subject agenda for this memoir.

I do not underestimate the importance of my protector role in Twinklebear’s life as an integral part of our Twin Flame Dynamic. Twin Flame relationships for every Twin Flame couple, have their own “Twin Flame Dynamic,” and this protector relationship is to a large degree, ours. It is what makes us unique in that the precedence for it—as it has for other Twin Flames but perhaps in different ways for them—occurred decades, perhaps centuries or millennia ago in the past for Twinklebear and me.

The late 11th to early 12th century precedent for us that occurred in a place like Mongolia, that was encapsulated so accurately in Twinklebear’s life long recurrent dream about me—set the stage for future lifetimes for us, from that point onward. Add in all of the other coincidental pieces of evidence, and we have emerging a highly provocative picture of past, present and future.

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I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pact Forever!
12 12 12 in every way

“NATURAL BEAUTY PART TWO”

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Twinklebear with her naturally curly hair.

ME: “Your hair looks beautiful, Baby!”

TWINKLEBEAR: “Really my Sookybear? I don’t know why. I didn’t do anything with it.”

ME: “I like it like that, you look gorgeous!”

TWINKLEBEAR: “Thank you. I know you like it curly.”

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My Twin Flame “Twinklebear” and I have a Facebook social group called Twin Flames Forever and a Day. This is a group for people who are seriously interested in the Twin Flame phenomenon. At this group, I post links to these memoirs I write. When I post links to our memoirs, a “preview” appears with a “thumbnail” of whatever photo I’ve chosen to accompany and illustrate the article. I’ve noticed that whenever I use a photo that does not feature Twinklebear, that half the number of visitors actually open and read the memoirs, compared to when I use a photo of Twinklebear.

That’s a two-to-one ratio, “Twinklebear photo”-to-“generic photo” comparison! The conclusion is inescapable. People naturally react to Twinkle’s natural beauty. Her natural beauty is such, that they react viscerally without even being aware of it. I cannot even begin to tell you how overwhelmed I am by her natural beauty. My God! So beautiful!

WARNING: This memoir is a Sugar Bomb! Guaranteed to give you diabetes, when the contents go off—so soppy and sweet! Ha! Look out!

What is a visceral reaction? “Visceral” means a “gut-reaction,” and refers to the “viscera,” which consists of one’s abdominal area. I also react to Twinklebear’s astounding beauty viscerally, but being her Twin Flame, I do so in a deeper and more intense way. You might say that my visceral reaction extends further down a few inches below my abdomen, where there is an autonomic response. Heh…I can hear Twinklebear’s voice so clearly now, in that sexy clipped Hastonian accent of hers….

“Sookybear! You bad boy! ‘DONK’…”

All kidding aside, it is worthwhile examining what beauty is, and how people perceive it in each other. In this case, I would like to analyze how Twinklebear and I perceive each other’s appearance. I would like to begin by stating without an iota of embarrassment, that we spend an inordinate amount of time gazing into each other’s faces. This up close appreciation of each other produces exclamations of, “You are so beautiful!” and “You are so handsome!”

I don’t know about my appearance but it should be obvious to anyone who has functional eyes and a half a brain, that Twinklebear is a beautiful woman in the classical sense. An old friend of mine was so struck by her eyes, that he commented, “She has oceans for eyes”—meaning that one can get lost in them. Believe it or not, Twinklebear and I actually think we look quite similar when we examine each other’s features (one thing we agree on, is that our mouths are uncannily identical, especially when we smile or laugh). One telling remark that Twinklebear began making about me over three years ago, is significant:

“You’re so handsome! You are so symmetrical!”

Sure, go ahead and laugh if you want. At first I thought her remark was odd, but now I get the significance of it. Twinklebear is brilliant beyond belief, far more brilliant than she even knows. She hits on the validity of ideas organically, with episodes of instant cerebral recognition. Look at this:

FROM A SCIENTIFIC JOURNAL

In ancient Greece, Helen of Troy, the instigator of the Trojan War, was the paragon of beauty, exuding a physical brilliance….she was the toast of Athens, celebrated….for her physical perfection. But why did the Greek men find Helen, and other beautiful women, so intoxicating? In an attempt to answer this question, the philosophers of the day devoted a great deal of time to this conundrum.

Plato wrote of so-called “golden proportions,” in which, amongst other things, the width of an ideal face would be two-thirds its length, while a nose would be no longer than the distance between the eyes. Plato’s golden proportions, however, haven’t quite held up to the rigors of modern psychological and biological research — though there is credence in the ancient Greeks’ attempts to determine a fundamental symmetry that humans find attractive. Symmetry is attractive to the human eye

Today, this symmetry has been scientifically proven to be inherently attractive to the human eye. It has been defined not with proportions, but rather with similarity between the left and right sides of the face Thus, the Greeks were only partially correct. By applying the stringent conditions of the scientific method, researchers now believe symmetry is the answer the Greeks were looking for.

To that I say to Twinklebear, “Hey Baby! You are so symmetrical, you sexy thing!” It is good to be validated by scientific double blind studies, no? Analyses of facial symmetry aside, looking at my Twinklebear makes my Twin Flame heart beat a lot faster. Who needs aerobic exercise, hey? I Just have to be reminded once in a while, that Twinklebear’s eyes are “up here!” “DONK”

Come to think of it, Twinklebear is quite symmetrical “down here” as well. Hey, I’d better quit while I’m ahead and still alive. Now, now my Twinklbear…put that Donking Rolling Pin down…you wouldn’t wanna spoil my facial symmetry, would you? Ha!

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I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pacr Forever
12 12 12 in every way

“THREE TRACK JOURNEY”

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Our Twin Flame journey is like trains on three tracks.

I tend to think in analogies, especially when something I’m trying to encapsulate is complex. Analogizing it allows my mind to organize it and grasp it more readily, in a succinct manner. This is particularly true of my Twin Flame journey with my Twin, “Twinklebear”—that it is complex. What makes it complex is that Twinklebear lives in England while I live in New York. Before my Twinklebear, I have never been in a long distance relationship.

Being in two different countries is like being trains on three separate tracks. In our two separate existences in two different localities, we are two trains on the outside tracks. But when we communicate by either text or video calling, our two trains converge and join on the central track, and travel as one train. I suppose that a parallel could be drawn between our logistical situation and a husband and wife who both go to work, and then rejoin in the evening. However, the fact that my Twinklebear and I cannot come together again in the evening, exaggerates the “two trains on three tracks” feeling. Twinklebear captured this feeling perfectly three years ago, when she said….

“I feel like a war bride!”

I love my Twinklebear so much. We have these heart rending conversations on occasion—the feeling is ever present, although it would be too painful to say it all the time—about how we wish with all our hearts that we could be living together. I have stated in past articles that I won’t be specific as to the reasons why we can’t, to preserve our privacy and I will abide by that.


Twinklebear and I wish we could be living together.

In the meantime, we are like two trains existing on three tracks. What we would like of course, is to join and become one train on that central track. After all, this is how we began at the beginning of time, when the One Soul that we were, was split into two by God. According to the Bible, God did this to 72,000 single souls to produce 144,000 people who would have the perfect mate somewhere in the world. This is by definition what “Twin Flames” are. Perfectly matched mates whose destiny is to reunite at some point.

It is only Twin Flames as couples, that enjoy perfect compatibility, the most intense feelings of love and need for each other, and a psychic link that enables synchronicity of thought and feeling. Twin Flames are often reincarnated spouses, who lived past lives together. In current times, Twin Flame partners instantly and intensely “know” each other when they first meet—as the residua of past lives lived together.

This is reinforced by recurrent dreams of the other from the past, and retrocognitive visions Latent memories of past lives together, are also a powerful reminder of why Twins “know each other so well,” immediately after they meet. For people who’ve just met, they are for all intents and purposes–strangers. Twinklebear’s and my Twin Flame journey, are rife with incredible examples of these phenomena. You would have to search through all of the memoirs I’ve written, to get an idea of the wide ranging scope of these.

I will give you one example. Since the age of around 15, Twinklebear has had the same recurrent dream about me, in which I rescued her from kidnappers in another life. This dream was so complete, even my mother appeared in them. When I say “recurrent dream” I’m not kidding. The dream was always the same. She had this same dream several times a year, until we met three and half years ago. That’s right. The dreams stopped cold, right after we met. Wait, there’s more.

This dream took place in a place like Mongolia in the 13th century. My nickname since I was in my 20s, is “Genghis” as in Genghis Khan. Also, Twinklebear had a fixation on Genghis Khan since an early age, when she pestered her Mum for biographies of Genghis Khan at the age of 8 (most kids of 8 ask for coloring books). All coincidence? I don’t think so.

Being true Twin Flames is the only only explanation for their foreknowledge of each other. This is indeed, the first clue to Twins, that they are Twin Flames. In our case, we did not even know what “Twin Flames” are. We were just so gobsmacked by how well we knew each other immediately. It was only researching this phenomenon of “knowing each other” that led us to learn what Twin Flames are. There is one comforting thought for us. Twinklebear and I know, that we are destined to be together, and that it will happen.

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I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pact Forever!
12 12 12 in every way

“FATE’S MISSED OPPORTUNITIES”

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I so want to be with my Twin Flame Twinklebear

I have a confession to make. Many times when I write, I do so in order to not go crazy. This is one of those times. This accounts for my writing coming so painfully close to the surface of full disclosure, when it comes to chronicling my Twin Flame journey with Twinklebear. But it will never be total disclosure in these memoirs, so as to protect our privacy.

The issues between us that are the most painful, occasionally break the surface like a great white shark, sticking its predatory nose where it is not wanted. This then causes a conflict between acute emotions of want and the need to be together, with the inability to do so right now. Then the question becomes an unambiguously pointed, “Then when?” We had such a pointed moment this morning. I am loathe to discuss this in public, but it is said that confession is good for the soul.

PSALM 119:26
Open confession is good for the soul. Nothing brings more ease and more life to a man than frank acknowledgement…

You already know from previous installments that Twinklebear lives in England while I live in New York, so that would not be a new acknowledgement. I will tell you though, that we have been trying to physically reunite for the past three and half years. To see each other, feel each other, would be heaven. We had two such chances last year, when this might have been possible. But The Fates would not cooperate for a 2018 reunification.

The first of two chances we had was in April 2018, but that chance was stunted by circumstances that involved an obstinate employer. This was compounded by a travel friend of Twinklebear’s who could not come to America with Twinklebear at that particular time of year. So when this trip was canceled, we made tentative plans for Twinklebear to travel to New York last November.

Unfortunately, Fate has a cruel sense of timing and humor, because in August 2018, I had to have a hip replacement surgery done. The rehab involved meant months of work when I could not walk normally. It was uncertain to me, when I would be able to walk and therefore get around well enough to see my beloved Twinklebear if she was here in New York.

Human frailty and unforeseen mitigating circumstances have played a role in causing us the pain resulting from our not having been able to physically reunite. I won’t lie to you–it does hurt, very much, not to be with her.

I will not deny that my rehab introduced psychological factors of self-doubt and a diminishing of self-confidence in terms of mobility, and I believe that is normal. That in itself, discouraged me from talking about concrete plans to reschedule Twinklebear’s visit to New York. Someone who loses his normal mobility loses some of his sense of “self” and that sense has to be rehabilitated along with one’s physical conditioning. Rehabilitation from hip replacement is both physical and mental.

My silence about her potential trip to New York had nothing to do with a diminution of my desire to see her here. It only had to do with “feeling like myself again,” which took a hit from my surgery. But when emotions of need are running high on both sides, things can become misconstrued.

I have said previously that these memoirs are therapeutic, not only for me but for Twinklbear as well. They also can serve another purpose, as this memoir does. My writing about my thoughts and feelings can dispel any misconceptions my Twin might have. For example, my reluctance to openly discuss when to reschedule her visit to New York, I believe she misconstrued to mean that “I didn’t want her to come.” Nothing could be further from the truth.

I remain optimistic. Even though my rehab has been delayed by some setbacks, it continues forward. But my mobility is only one factor in allowing us to fulfill our physical reunification. I am optimistic, because of the surety of the love that Twinklebear and I have, and that love is forever. In the meantime, my writing is my way of dealing with my pain and frustration.

I write therefore I am sane.

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I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pact Forever!
12 12 12 in every way

“NATURAL BEAUTY WITH MODESTY”

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Twinklebear has incredible natural beauty.

FROM DICTIONARY.COM
modesty:
noun. the quality of being modest; freedom from vanity, boastfulness.

Okay, so I’m human. While I am ultimately concerned with the higher spiritual reaches of my Twin Flame journey with my Twinklebear, I have to admit that I am constantly love struck by her natural good looks. She makes my Alpha Male instincts alive again, which have been dulled in modern man since Neanderthal days. And my Alpha Male instincts definitely spike, when I look at Twinklebear.

My God, she is one hot lookin’ woman!

So, you’ll pardon me if I occasionally go off the rails, and write about what I call Twinklebear’s more base charms that appeal to my Alpha Maleness. Actually, “appeal to” is just a euphemism for “turns me on.” I know, Twin Flames are supposed to live in Polite Society. So sue me, okay?

I can’t help it. Blame it on my being hardwired like any red-blooded male, to react to the incredible beauty that my Twin Flame “Twinklebear” possesses. When I look at her, it is like a fuse in my mind’s sensuality center is ignited. When the fuse’s burning culminates at the terminal point, I go….”KABLOOM!”….with a seismographic spurt. Think “magnitude 7” on the Richter Scale.

Yet, to hear her self-assessment of her appearance, she seems almost dumbfounded and distinctly embarrassed, that I would allude to her incredible beauty. When I call her beautiful, I almost expect her to swivel her head around to look for who I’m really talking about! Bad girl! Ha! She’ll never really realize how beautiful she is.

My Twinklebear has a healthy modesty that is wholly out of proportion to how she appears. Normally, a woman as beautiful and sexy looking as she, is insufferably conceited and full of herself. Not my Twinklebear. And I’m glad. She is so genuine.

She has a depth to her that is wholly appropriate to her genuineness, if incongruous with her beauty. In popular culture, women who look as gorgeous as Twinklebear are iconized and put on a pedestal, for the right or wrong reasons.

That’s what many don’t get about Twinklebear. She has a brilliant mind that suggests that she should according to popular stereotyping, should look like a nerd with a genius IQ.

So, this memoir is a succinct paean to both her beautiful mind and character, as well as her ultra-feminine charms. I love you, my AC Twinklebear, you sexy and smart thing! I know, your “eyes are up here.” “DONK” “Owwww! YOU!”

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I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
12 12 12 in every way

“SENTIMENTS”

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Twinklebear’s sentiments mirror mine, apropos of “Twins.”

FROM A LINGUISTICS BLOG

“My parents will call anyone displaying overly sentimental behaviour – such as crying at a film – a soppy date. I’ve picked it up, of course, but I think by and large it’s people of pre-war vintage who use the phrase. I say ‘pre-war vintage’, but my father put it rather better at a family party while discussing 1930s art with a member of the younger generation: he referred to himself as a genuine piece of Art Deco.

I’m not exactly sure where the ‘date’ part comes in but the phrase is or was current enough to merit inclusion in the Oxford English Dictionary as a term of ‘affectionate abuse’. Although its currency is obviously wider, I’ve known it mostly as a family phrase because I’ve really missed out on all the jocular things people say to each other in the background and so don’t really know how common the phrase is now.”

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TWINKLEBEAR IN LATE JANUARY 2016
“I’m so into you.”

TWINKLEBEAR ON MAY 22, 2019
“I’m so drawn to you.”

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Early on in our Twin Flame journey, my Twin Flame “Twinklebear” said that we were “soppy dates.” At that time, I did not know what this British slang (Twinklebear is English and I am American) meant. This happens from time to time in our wonderful conversations, and these slight differences between the British and American popular language are fascinating to us. These small differences not only spark interesting dialogue between us, they also make each of us examine the origins of slang more thoroughly.

Twinklebear then explained to me that a “soppy date” is a person who is demonstrably romantic or sentimental. I’ve gotta tell ya, that’s Twinklebear and I to a T. Take for example, two quotes of Twinklebear’s that I pointed out. In January of 2016 she said to me, “I’m so into you.” A couple of days ago, almost three and half years after she said that, she said, “I’m so drawn to you.”

What do you notice about these two offhanded utterances? They are obviously very similar, in that they express a very specific mindset, couched in quite similar language. Looking further into the nuances of these two statements, what do they tell us about said mindset? It is the language of the romantically infatuated. I will also say that, “I’m so drawn to you” is not something a person more than three years into a romantic relationship, would say. “I’m so drawn to you” is uttered by a person who is in the grip of full-fledged, crazy-in-love-frenzy.

FROM THE OXFORD DICTIONARY
infatuation:
Noun. A intense but short-lived passion for someone.

We all know what romantic infatuation is. Another slang phrase for it is “puppy love,” bringing to mind two love-struck teens, destined to fall desperately in love only to fall inevitably out of love, three weeks later. My point about Twinklebear and I is, we are neither teens nor has it been three weeks since we fell desperately in love.

It has been over three years since we fell head over heels, madly in love.

And we have not shown any signs of slowing down. If anything, we are more desperately in love now, than over three years ago. If we were soppy dates three years ago, then we are more “soppy” now—and getting soppier by the day. Given the upward trajectory of our “soppy datedness,” we needed life vests three years ago—and now might need a full-sized ocean-going raft to stay above the sop.

It is amazingly unembarrassing for me to admit how soppy and romantic we are. Four years ago for me, it would have been unthinkable to admit such a strong romantic streak of behavior and talk. Before Twinklebear and I met, admitting such a thing would have been the equivalent of me wearing a poodle skirt and a blouse with kittens on it! Hey! Watch it! I can hear you! Ha!

But I am not embarrassed at all. What my Twin Flame and I have in terms of soppiness, is overtly miraculous, wonderful in the fullest sense of the word and like food, water and air to me now. I don’t mind telling people that Twinklebear and I tell each other “I love you” twenty times a day, and mean it with a full song of the heart playing in the background, every single time.

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I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, podmates always
Bear Pact Forever!
12 12 12 in every way

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