“Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.”
I can promise ya this. We’re not going to be average today.
If you’ve paid attention to my memoirs for the past year or so, they’ve revolved around the sometimes seismic events that have shaped our lives. The “our” refers to my twin flame, “Twinklebear” Lesley Maclean and me.
If you don’t know what “twin flames” are by now, after reading the reams of memoirs I’ve written since December of 2016, then there is no hope for you. Turn in your Average IQ Identity Card, in exchange for a Morons Club Card.
I may have been hasty, in implying that Twinklebear’s and my twin flame world revolved around the events that have buffeted us. It has not been the events that were at our core.
It was pure emotion at our core.
We cannot control what life throws at us. But we can control how we react to them.
In our twin flame world, Twinklebear and I are like complementary planets, who are always in perfect contrecouop angle to each other, as we are each other’s perfect other half.
Twinklebear’s and my twin flame world is like a solar system, where our love is our sun, giving us warmth, strength, guidance and perseverance.
In the last two years, Twinklebear and I could not control what life threw at us, but our “sun”—our love—guided us in being able to outthink, outsmart, outmuscle and outlast the troubles and travails, that life tested us with.
God, I love Twinklebear so much! Too much!
This is what I’m talking about, the unimaginable love that all crave and dream about, but very few achieve with another. The perfect, overwhelming love I’ve been talking about in these memoirs.
I can analyze it, dissect it in an intellectual fashion, I can put it under a sociological microscope. But one fact is inescapable—I truly love Twinklebear, more than words can express. It defies logic and “outer” reality.
Twinklebear, I love you unconditionally, totally and without reservation, my love.
I wish that didn’t sound like such a cliche’!
It is difficult to express emotional thoughts, in intellectual terms. It is a little like mixing water and water-soluble oil. Some comprehensible thoughts may may seep through for interpretation, but the essence is lost.
It is this overpowering love that Twinklebear and I feel for each other, so totally and unconditionally, that has guided us past the negative twists and turns, that life has thrown at us.
I love you, Tiwnklebear!
Okay, I’m going to contradict myself here–but not really, as you will see.
I did say in the beginning of this memoir, that it is emotions that matter, not events. However, it is something very event-related that makes me glad right now.
MY OLD “HOME” AT MY NOW DEFUNCT JOB: I mourned its loss.
Let me explain.
I worked in my job for 27 years. In that expanse of time, my office in the medical practice I worked in, was a—place of attachment—it felt like “home,” after so many years.
After my ex-boss advised me that I would be losing my office space to doctors we rented space to, I felt that I was losing my “home” at work. My office at work, gained additional meaning because of Twinklebear.
That office in the past two years, also became more like “home” where I could videoconference with my twin flame love, Twinklbear–she being in England, and me being in NYC. This became a “tipping point” in my decision to resign from my job immediately.
Our “home” was precious to me.
In any case, after my ex-boss took my “work home” away, and “our” home away, I had to leave that 27 year old home, to establish a new “home” for my beloved Twinklebear and me.
So you see, it really is about pure emotion, and not events.
But coldly focusing on what I called my “work home” is also instructive. Because there were violently roiling emotions, I felt regarding the loss of my work office.
I grieved the loss of my office at work
My office meant so much to me, that I felt like I was grieving the loss of a loved one.
A retrospective look at my feelings when I was informed that I was losing my “work home,” reveals much that was not apparent then.
It too, was about “pure emotion” for me, as well as the “event.” I am a very territorial person. I felt extremely possessive about my work office.
MY NEW HOME “OFFICE”: I’m proud of it.
Since I left my job, only a week ago, I have reestablished my “office” at home. Only this time, it really is at home–and not a remote location.
I can’t tell you how this has helped me regain my equilibrium emotionally. I am proud of my new office—much in the way I was proud of my office at the medical practice. My home office has filled a void emotionally..
I am such flawed human being.
I am proud of my new home office, because it salves my feeling of loss of my old “home” at the medical practice, a home that had become so much more meaningful, because I love Twinklebear so very much.
It also reminds me of how much of a territorial alpha dog I am–because of how proud I am of my new office.
I love my new office! I love it, and I love you, Twinklebear—so very much! You bad sexy girl!
I am myself again.
For Twinklebear and I, “feeling like myself” has been so very important for us in turbulent times. There have been so many events that have tried to throw us off. But, we found equilibrium. we achieved homeostatsis, because of the incredible love and bond we have–and always will have–forever and a day.
It’s all about emotion.
I love you, Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Twin Flames, Podmates always
Bear Pact Forever
12 12 12 in every way
SCOTT “SOOKYBEAR” WONG