Click here for Home

TWINKLEBEAR: In the beginning, we were incredulous.

Were we going insane?

This is the tale that had to be told. It is the saga of how I and my Soulmate, Twinklebear Lesley Maclean, dealt with the harsh and sudden reality of our falling madly, head over heels in love, upon first meeting.

But that is exactly what happened. Twinklebear and I saw each other, and BAM! It was like that scene in “The Godfather” where Michael Corleone, laid eyes on his Sicilian love, and fell instantly, head over heels, Hollywood-style, crazy-in-love, in contravention of logic and conventional reality, with his Sicilian honey. In the film, Michael was struck by a thunderbolt of instant love—and that is exactly what happened to me, with my sexy Twinklebear.

We all know about “falling in love at first sight.” It is an oft discussed occurrence, that is the stuff of Hollywood fiction and romance novels. But hey, there it is—soppy and sloppy. It happened to us, okay—whether we believed in the concept of “love at first sight” or not.

Frankly, most people have no freakin’ idea of what “love at first sight” is, in all of its complex glory–because this phenomenon is so far outside of commonplace experience. I believe that true love at first sight, only occurs between true Soulmates.

Ah, love at first sight. What a wonderful concept, except, it wasn’t all smooth sailing for Twinklebear and me. No, it was more like….

We both seriously wondered if we were going insane!

Neither of us had experienced the deep and intense desire for each other, and need for being in the presence of the other, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week—before. Not like this. This was a different kettle of fish than any fare we’d partaken of before. And it went on unabated from the very beginning.

Love never took a holiday or vacation for us.

The feverish desire to be together, was relentless. We both considered at moments of individual solitude, whether we were respectively, going crazy! Was this some sort of pathological obsession, found in the deeper chapters of abnormal psychology textbooks?

Would we end up as jabbering idiots, wasting away in institutional padded rooms, saliva freely running down our chins? We had no idea. Speaking for myself, I felt like my world was turned upside down. The “reality” of my existence, became represented by the time I spent with Twinklebear, and the “unreality” was…..the rest of my life.

“How can I be thinking of this woman all the time, seemingly every minute of every day?” I asked myself.

I tied to resist it, by withdrawing from Twinklebear, finding myself weakening in mere hours of trying to leave, drawn back to her like receptive metal to a powerful electromagnet. Twinklebear tried to pull away from me, by winding me up, trying to drive me away by making me jealous, only to succumb like me, within hours of her attempt to break away.

We were dead meat, resigned to being hopelessly and intensely in love with each other, with no help for this affliction, in sight!

We slowly came to the inevitable conclusion, that we were mad-crazy-in-love, head-over-heels-in-love—and that there wasn’t a damn thing either of us could do about it.

I love you Twinklebear
Forever and a day
Bear Pact Forever!
12 12 12 in every way


2 thoughts on ““MEMOIR: SWEET TORTURE”

  1. Thank you so much. AC sookybear, I love you , always and a day! Such perfect, words, and sentiment, I could not have put it better myself! Ha! 🙂 your words, are touching, and true. I count the hours, we will be reunited. 121212 always.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aww..I love you so much, AC Twinklebear! We certainly have been tested by fire, ice, water and air—in the early days. And the small barriers keep falling off like petals of a flower, as we get closer and closer. I love you, Forever and a day. 12 12 12 🙂


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: